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03/28/2012

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Tell my little sister? I'm the one reading Lily's Passport to Paris. AND LOVING IT! I think that I can relate to Lily more than I ever did. And Art, oh he's awesome! Yes Nancy I think I've finally found the books I need to read. It's good to be back. Thanks for writing the best books, like, ever.

Will return with my choices sometime soon.

I need to think of a tween I can recommend Lily to...

An online course sounds interesting, what would it be like?

My first choice is #3, letting go of the past. That was a big thing for me a few years ago when I was pretty depressed and lately its been bothering more. Like it's just that little annoyance poking me saying "I can't believe you did that. Remember when you said that? You're a terrible person for doing that."

My audition...this is really hard to write. I thought it went well. It's a small company and I was almost positive I would get in. It wasn't my best day, but I didn't think I did that bad. Last night I got the email. I was rejected. I don't know why, all the letter said was that I was no accepted to the company. It really hit me hard because I never thought that I wouldn't get in. It was more whether I would go on not. TO make it worse last night about an hour before I got my email, I'd just thought that I really would like to go there after all. Then I didn't make it. As far as I know I'm the only person who didn't get in, which doesn't make sense to me. I know it wasn't my best day and I messed up a few of the combinations, but my technique is solid.

I'm just really confused right now. I thought it was such a God-thing. I'd never really heard of the company until I sent in my audition video and it so seemed like it was what God wanted me to do. Last night I was really upset, I can't remember crying that hard for a long time. Please be praying that God would show me his will for my life. I was afraid of making a decision, but now I feel cornered, like I have no choice. The only place I was accepted is a college and it just didn't feel right. So I really have no idea right now and I'm just very discouraged.

I am so, so sorry, Melody. :( I wish I could cry with you and hug you and pray for you. Because that stuff is so hard, and we can't help but cry. But know that I truly am praying for you...love you, my sister in Christ. <3

And I have to agree, my first choice is #3. Lately, especially, it seems, I've been replaying ugly moments in my head. When I made a total fool of myself. When I made the wrong decision. Etc.

So, yeah. Praying for you all! Love and blessings!

Oh I'm so excited about your little Arthur! :D
I like choice 2 and 3. :)
I just happened to catch a glimpse of your post, Melody. I know how you feel and I'm sooo sorry! :(

Melody, I'm so sorry. That must hurt so bad, I can't imagine. I'm praying that God will show you His will for your life. I know this might not make you feel better right now but God has great plans for you and just because He's closed the door on one opportunity doesn't mean there won't be others...He will show you where He wants you. just getting to know you here on the blog I know how special you are, God is going to use you :) I love you!

I'd really like to start with #3. I've been realizing what I thought I'd let go of, I'm really still holding on to a little bit of it. Not a day goes by that I don't think about my past mistakes. most times its just a passing thought, like "I'm a screw up" or something..even in joking...but there is always a little truth to every "just kidding". I think i still believe, I'm just a little bit more messed up then my friends and family. I know in my head that my past mistakes don't define me, that Jesus has forgiven me, but I'm not sure its actually made its way to my heart yet..I don't know...just kind of thinking "out loud" here. :)

Mrs. Rue your kitty is so cute! I've been meaning to read the Lilly series again, there are so many good life lessons in there. I will be telling my sister about them though too! :) And, how would this online course work?

Girls, quick prayer request. I'm going to be baptized! I think I'm going to do it on Easter. I've been feeling like this is what God wants me to do for a while now but kept pushing the thought away because I didn't want to do it. But I realized while I kept asking God what He wanted me to be doing to serve Him, baptism was the thing that kept popping into my mind. So finally I relented and told my mom that I wanted to do it. She was really happy and I feel do happy too now that I've decided to do it. I'm just really scared too though to go up in front of my whole church...I go to a pretty big church. Anyway, if you could just pray that everything goes well and I don't have a panic attack or anything haha, that would be great!

Thanks girlies, Love you all! <3

Oh Melody, I'm so sorry to hear that. It sounds like you really have a passion for this and it's a big bummer ... I am only a junior in high school but I'm already worried about rejections because I have a lot of friends who are seniors. I feel like my art really is a gift and I hope I can do it in the future, too. I'll pray for you.

MY 1st choice is number 1. I'm sorry Melody. I will pray for you, and I hope God shows you what you should do next.

My 1st choice is #2

Melody, I am praying for you! Totally feel your pain!

Could you girls please pray for me? My grandpa is in the hospital with a cancerous brain tumor and blood clots in his lungs. The doctor says 6 months is VERY optimistic. I would really appreciate prayers for him and for my family.

Love y'all!

You know, Therese, it's kinda dumb, isn't it? I mean, back in the day when John the Baptist baptized people, THEY didn't have to give a testimony. They just said they believe in Jesus or whatever. Actually I said something like that to my dad once and he said that it's all good you don't actually have to give a testimony it's just so people know your journey or whatever:) but what about those of us that *gasp* don't have any interesting life story?!?!

plus the fact that we don't have a church right now. oh well. i still love Jesus i don't got to be baptized for that<3 but anyway I shall stop this ramble and say, Nicole! I know you'll do great and your testimony will be awesome and i'm so glad you love Jesus because Jesus is life isn't it beautiful.

Don't you hate it when you press enter and, bam, you read what you wrote and it just doesn't sound like what you want it to say? Sigh.

Forget what I wrote about whatever I said and let's go with this. I am scared of public speaking and that's why I'm too scared to get baptized and I wish we weren't expected to give a testimony! Yes, that's better.

And Melody; ohh I'm so sorry. i'll be praying for you, and just know that Jesus loves you and Jeremiah 29:11.

Therese, praying for you baptism!! :) That's awesome that you've decided to do it...and for me, it's not something to be scared of...it's fun and exciting and renewing and everything like that! Though I'd still be nervous, a bit. I was baptized when I was, like, 8 or 9 or something like that. I still remember it. The water was cold. But my dad dunked me down and brought me up and I loved it.

Yeah, Emii - I'm scared of public speaking, too!! That's interesting, tho, my church doesn't have the people being baptized give a testimony. Actually, now that I think about it, they hand out a piece of paper on the days that we have baptisms with the names of the people who are being baptized as well as each of their testimonies. Sometimes one person's testimony is a whole long paragraph and sometimes it's a sentence or two. I love 'em all. :) Oh, and did you mean someone else when you said my name up there, on your first comment?

Love you all!

Melody-I'm praying for you. Just remember that God has something special planned for you.
My choice would be number 2, because I just get confused about who I am and I want to figure my different sides out

I vote for #2!

I want to explore #2 the most ... I'm trying to connect more with God right now as well as work toward college and independence and develop my academic and artistic interests. It can be so overwhelming.

My first choice is number 2.
Melody, I'm so sorry. I will definitely keep you in my prayers.
Jyllenna, I will also keep your family in my prayers.

Nicole -- oops, yes! Haha THERESE. In my mind your name's are similar aha. :D My bad:)

#1
#2
#3

Hey! :)
I'm not sure how many of ya'll will remember me, but I was a pretty regular commenter on here a couple of years ago. I haven't been on here in, obviously, AGES, but I do flick my screen onto IRL every now and again for old times' sakes... ;) Looking through your comments, it's so awesome to see so many familiar names! :'D
Anyway I thought I'd comment on this post because this is something I've been chewing over lately, though whole many-sides thing. My problem is not so much letting all my sides shine... I make time for things I like doing, even if those things are super weird or random. My problem is more that usually, only a few sides show with different people, so I can end up acting really different with different people, and all those sides are "me" just different sides of me. It sometimes works but sometimes not so much, like if different groups of people that I've been acting differently with meet... Like I can be really bubbly and excited and random with some friends and super serious and calm and mature with others. Sometimes I have people who I can be both around, and it's gradually getting more and I'm trying to work on it, but still... it's an issue :)
So I'm not really sure which number to vote! ;D All the topics would work :)
Not sure if this is a one-off comment or whether i'll be back, because I'm not enjoying spending too much time on the computer at the moment (especially with SPRING coming! Anyone else completely psyched!? ;D)
-Bethan :).

Bethan, I totally know what you mean by showing different sides with different people. I struggle with the same thing. And it does get confusing. And sometimes i like how I act with certain people and then im hanging out with other people the next day and I'll be totally different... but I dont want to be.
Mrs. Rue, maybe this is something we could talk about....

Bethan!! It's SO great to hear from you! :) Yeah, I agree with you and Mimi - it's so weird how we do that. It's not so extreme anymore with me, different sides with different people, I mean. I'm not sure why...it's still difficult for me, tho, to share more serious things with people, even close friends. Which is kind of odd, because I'm often very open if I'm not face-to-face with someone, like on my blog or through email. But sometimes, actually with people, it can just be awkward - or, as the case often is, I expect it to be awkward, so I don't want to even take that chance of bringing up something new and different and maybe even kinda personal because I don't want anything to change. Y'know what I mean?

...hope that all made sense! ;) It's kinda late where I am - OK, quite late - so I'm kinda of rambling and a bit...ah...out of order. {?} ;D Aren't we all?

Jyllenna, I'm so sorry. :( I will definitely be praying for you and your family!

And, just wondering, is your grandpa saved? (sometimes I'd rather say 'saved' instead of 'a Christian'...when you think about it, you're like - hey! I'm saved! I've got salvation - I'm going to heaven with Jesus!! ;) just a random thought...yeah, I need to go to sleep).

Good night, all! Love you!

Thanks Nicole :)

Emii, We don't have to give out testimony, thankfully! :)

BETHAN!!!!
Ooh, lucky, Therese! I guess it's an Aussie thing then aha.

Thank you so much for all your kind comments and prayers girls :) A couple of them made me cry and I wish I could give you all a big hug <3

Anyway, so I've decided that this was really an answer to prayer. I was so heartbroken and disappointed, but I think it's going to be a good thing. I had been praying over and over that God would just make his will abundantly clear and He did. Remember when I wanted that neon flashing sign? I got it apparently, it just hurt a little and I learned from that. I was so completely expecting to get in to that company that I was "counting my chickens before they hatched", I was claiming to know the will of God and I didn't and still don't. (Random fact: my mom asked the director why I didn't get in so I could improve on it. She said that though my dancing was good, when they were praying about it they didn't feel a peace about me joining them. So, it wasn't anything that I did wrong.) But anyway, I've accepted it now and trying to get excited about the college that I'm going to. (Mrs. Rue, am I allowed to say where I'm going on here?) I'm still pretty nervous about it, but every time I've been really worried about something in recent memory, it's worked out amazingly. So, bottom line: God's got in handled :)

Melody that's great that you've come to peace about it! Isn't God awesome how He works sometimes? :)

You know, I really don't come on here often enough. I've missed you all! (I've been reading, but not really commenting.)

First choice - probably a tie between 1 & 2.

I did read the last post, and the sides of myself that I want them to come out are a big sister, photographer, and writer.

I remember when I went to the Faithgirlz event in Barrie, ON - it was so fun!

Abbie /// XOXOX

Hi Girls!
Bethan, you inspired me. :) I know, a couple months back, I commented and said I’d be coming ‘round here more regularly – and then promptly went into radio silence again. So, I shall premise this by saying that I’m still reading, and although you might not hear from me again for more months, it’s great to know you’re all still here, doing lovely God-things and learning so much. I hope I’ll be back to join you more often. :)
Topic choice is hard, because I think I am struggling a little bit with all of them. What Nicole, Bethan, and Mimi brought up really resonated with me, though. For some reason, it is easier for me to express my opinions, be outgoing, and disagree with people when I’m doing it in writing rather than face-to-face. Part of it, I think, may just be my personality – I like to think things out before I say them, so reacting split-second to a conversation is not my forte. However, during my activities these last few weeks, I’ve noticed an odd change – suddenly, I don’t feel uncomfortable being spontaneous, random, and just myself. That’s odd, because I usually cross-examine any random action/thing I say after I do it, and feel excruciatingly self-conscious. All I know is that there’s been a change. And that I'm loving it, and hoping it lasts. :) And that none of my friends, thus far, have walked out on me. ;) Anyway!! That said, my topic choices would be in this order: 2, 3, and 1.
I’ll be praying for you as you make this transition, Melody! It is hard to know exactly what God is up to, but I’m sure He’s working your life to a glorious purpose. I’ll also be praying for your grandfather, Jyllenna, and for your baptism, Therese!
Love you all! And may my massive comment now come to an end…
Friends Forever and Into Eternity,
Wren

Bethan and Wren, its so good to hear from you again! :D

I agree with what some of you were saying about how I let different sides of me show with different people. Wren you just described me perfectly! I usually always think before I speak and if I do say something out of the ordinary I always look back later and am like, "Ugh, I cannot believe I said that!" These days it seems I just don't know how to act around everyone and I'm wondering which of these sides I show are really me...or could they all be me?

Hey y'all!
Emii, I totally agree with you on your first comment. I'm rereading the Sophie books now! They're just so good and I can't seem to put them down!
Melody, I'll totally be praying for you! That must be so hard but I know you will get through it. God has wonderful plans for your life.:)
Therese, I'll be praying for your baptism. I got baptized a couple years ago and I was so nervous. I was very proud of myself afterwards, though, and I know you will be too.:)
Jyllenna, I'll be praying for you and your family.
Wren and Bethan - Great to hear from you!
Mrs. Rue, congrats on your new addition! I looked on the tween blog and he's so cute!
Could y'all also pray for my grandmother? They found out she has colon cancer. Me and my family are hoping that everything will go okay with her surgery. Thanks!
My first choice is 2. I really need to work on letting my inner self shine. The order of the others are 3 and 1. I don't get on any social media sites except this one or text and email that much so I don't really have a problem with 1.
♥Love y'all!♥

Welcome back Bethan and Wren!

Quick comment: Today I was pretty stressed out and knew that I wouldn't get through the week at the rate I was going. So I decided to take 30 minutes, sequester myself into my room and journal and pray and worship. So I put my phone face down across the room for me, turned on my worship music playlist really loud, and closed my door. I journaled away all my frustration, then focused on God and worshipping. It was really, really great. I just danced, and sang, and realized how awesome God really is. It totally turned my week around and helped me to focus on whats really important. So yeah, just a little encouragement, if your stressed out, take some time and worship on your own. God's there wherever you are, you don't have to be in church or camp or whatever. You can have the same amazing worship experience all on your own.

Therese, your comment: "These days it seems I just don't know how to act around everyone and I'm wondering which of these sides I show are really me...or could they all be me?" exactly describes my thoughts on this... trying to figure out whether or not all sides are 'me' and it's nothing to really worry about, or if I need to sort of mash them up altogether, or whaaa...? ;)
Melody: That's awesome :). Especially admiring the whole putting-phone-face-down-away-from-you decision. Definitely helps in a God-time!! :D

xx

Like Melody, I had the most amazing time with Jesus yesterday morning. And in the passionate strum of the guitar (I have a blister on my thumb to show for it!) and me just singing and not caring if half the notes were off because nobody could hear me outside -- I heard.

I was born to love You, Jesus.

Hi girls!
It's so cool to hear about everyone getting reconnected with God! :) It's snowing in my neck of the woods, and just looks so peaceful outside. I'm hoping some of it will transfer into me today!
I have a prayer request. We just recieved word that a young man from my youth group is in intensive care. No one is quite sure what happened, but it is serious. So just send up a prayer for him today.
Thanks! I'll keep your grandmother in my prayers, Lexi.
Wren

Thanks SO much, Wren! I'll pray for the young man in your youth group. BTW I wish it would snow where I live!:P Melody, I do that all the time. Just go in my room, shut the door, turn on my Christian music, and talk to God. It really calms me down and brings me closer to Him. Emii, I do that same thing, too! I play the piano and it is such a stress-buster when I can just sit down and play a pretty worship song.:)
♥Love y'all!♥

I'm so sorry about your audition, Melody! I totally know how that feels:( God probably has something even more awesome in mind for you. I'll be praying for you!

I think I missed the deadline (oops) but my choices would be 2, 3, and 1. (I don't have a Facebook so 1 just doesn't apply to me too much) I think I've gotten so wrapped up in schoolwork, studying for ACT's and SAT's and AP's, entering essay contests...that I haven't had time to focus much on my relationship with God or think about how I should be acting and bringing out the best in myself. And as to number 3, I keep kicking myself over stuff I've said in the past, especially to non-Christian friends, which I worry might keep them away from the truth. It's a load of guilt I just can't seem to shake.

So glad you're back Bethan and Wren! I'm the same way, I haven't been on here as much lately, but I still check it every day... Life is just really overwhelmeing right now and I feel like I don't have time to do anything :( I miss you girls!

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