Ladies, I nearly dropped my latte just now. Truly, moments ago I had an experience that stopped me in mid-sip, and nudged me to change the title of this post to what you see above. I'll explain in a minute. I'll try to catch my breath while I tell you about our prayer requests.
Today, your sisters have asked you to talk to God about:
*GRACE ANNE who experienced a God-thing right at her locker a few days ago. You'll want to read her comment. Loving God, we give you thanks.
* MELODY who had an almost complete stranger pray for her in a way that made her feel as if God were whispering Melody's needs into the girl's ear. Loving God, we give you thanks.
* GRACE ANNE whose youth group retreat was amazing and left her feeling closer to God than ever. Loving God, we give you thanks.
* RACHEL whose struggle with jealousy got a start on healing when she was on a pilgrimage this last weekend. Loving God, we give you thanks.
* THERESE who is struggling. Merciful God, hear our prayer.
* AMY who feels herself straying away from God. She wants in her heart to become a better Christian but when it comes to actually putting that into practice, it doesn't go too well. Merciful God, hear our prayer.
* JYLLENNA is no longer afraid to say to God, "I'll do whatever you want me to do." She is "entering a whole new season of obedience." Loving God, we give you thanks.
* NANCY -- me -- because as a result of the work we've done together here on the blog ever since Advent, I want to start a new project that is nudging at me -- only I don't see how I can possibly squeeze one more thing into an already bulging schedule. Merciful God, hear our prayer.
Your Responses To Our Last Post:
I invited you to express any doubts and questions you have in your life with God:
RACHEL: If Jesus wants her to lay down her life, take up her cross, and follow wherever Jesus leads -- does all the stuff she has to do now in terms of school and soccer and family really matter? Is that laying down her life?
AMY: Why is it so hard to put Christianity into practice?
SASHA: What happens if you commit a sin you don't even know about? How are you supposed to repent and be forgiven? And what happens to Christians who die before they have a chance to repent of all the sins they did that day? THERESE and RACHEL responded to her with love and wisdom. Where were the girls like you when I was growing up?
MELODY: While studying Dante's Inferno in college, she's questioning whether some things are unforgiveable, and whether God's nature is more wrathful or loving, and how God can be a God of love if hell is really the way it's described in the book. In terms of her frustration with her own life -- am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? -- she has come to the conclusion (and a correct one, I think) that she needs to stay with it, and not stop questioning but seek answers instead of letting the questions build up inside of her. She's going to remember that no matter what she may be confused about, God DOES love her. And all of us.
And then there was PAIGE -- which brings me to today's session, and that extraordinary moment I had when I began to write this post . . .
OBEDIENCE SESSION #6
READ: Before I start writing a post in this series, I sit down with the Gospel of John and look for the next passage where Jesus further defines obedience. Yesterday the passage that came up was a hard one, which led to all our questions and doubts. I knew it was going to keep getting harder, this obedience thing, because as he goes on with his ministry on earth, Jesus asks us to go deeper and deeper, and to have faith in things that are confusing and almost impossible to understand. (big breath)
But as I waited for my latte to cool enough for me to take my first sip, I went on into John anyway. The way was murky. Jesus wasn't saying anything really specific, you know? Everybody was trying to figure him out logically, and he kept giving them obtuse answers:
THE PEOPLE: "Can it be that the authorities really know that this is the Messiah? Yet we know where this man is from, but when the Messiah comes, no one will know where he is from." (John 7:26-27)
JESUS: "You know me, and you know where I am from; I have not come on my own, but the one who sent me is true, and you do not know him. I know him because I am from him, and he sent me." (28)
Huh?
Stil nothing specifically about obedience, so I read on. In the next scene, Jesus is there at the last day of the festival where all this is going on (the Festival of Booths) and he cries out: "Let anyone who is thirsty come to me, and let the one who believes in me drink. As the scripture has said, 'Out of the believer's heart shall flow rivers of living water.'" The passage then goes on to explain, in retrospect: "Now he said this about the Spirit, which believers in him were to receive; for as yet there was no Spirit, because Jesus was not yet glorified."
That's when I got it. Okay, REAL obedience is about living in the Spirit which WE have now. It isn't just about figuring out what God wants us to do in every situation -- it's about being thirsty for God and drinking him in the way Jesus shows us -- by living in the Spirit.
It's not logical. It's not something we can "figure out". That's what I wanted to tell you. But how was I going to do that?
I wasn't sure I knew. But I put the title: "Thought Experiments" on the subject line (it has to do with Einstein and isn't worth explaining at the moment) and began to read your comments as I always do just before I start the post.
And there was PAIGE's comment. When she came back from the Dominican Republic over a year ago she'd read about the Holy Spirit in Acts, how it descended upon the disciples and early Christians, the power and awe of it completely unfathomable.
That's when I almost dropped my latte. You see why.
Paige's doubt question is: "Is it still here? Do we still have the Holy Spirit burning inside of us? How am I not healing people and speaking in tongues?" (actually I can answer that -- Paul explains later that we all have different gifts; I'm not speaking in tongues either, Paige) Basically she wants to know: WHAT HAPPENED TO THE HOLY SPIRIT?
PONDER: With God, explore that question. Where is she, that Holy Spirit? Do you ever experience it? Does it ever burn in you? Can you imagine what would happen if it did? What might you be called to do right now that it would TAKE the Holy Spirit to move you to do? Are you trying to understand God instead of entering into the mystery of God?
PRAY: Simply pray: "God, I'm thirsty for you." Or "God, I want to be thirsty for you." Then listen. Just listen for the still, small voice.*
NUDGED TO ACTION: I'll leave this one to the Holy Spirit . . .
SHARE: Whatever you're moved to. I'll go first. I'm clearly moved to take on that project I mentioned in our prayer section. I am going to stop trying to figure out how I can possibly do it and simply let this one unfold. I may be inviting you to join me.
As for that treasure chest, if I could put all of you in it, I would.
Blessings,
Nancy Rue * That still small voice passage is the theme of the book that's coming out in August, Merciful Scar. What are you doing, Paige, reading my journals?
Today I was talking to a girl who comes to my Bible study and who I'm kind of mentoring, and she was telling me about her conversion experience at a Christian youth conference last week. She described how she tangibly felt the Holy Spirit moving her as she prayed. Jesus called his disciples "you of little faith" at one point, and I think that sometimes because we don't have the type of faith in God "that moves mountains," we can overlook or explain away the presence of the Holy Spirit in our lives. In places like China and Nigeria, where Christians are persecuted, God performs miracles and appears to people in dreams. I think that the Holy Spirit does, in some sense, adapt to the culture in which we live.
Posted by: Katie | 01/29/2013 at 05:18 PM
I have so much to say on this subject that I don't even know where to start... When I was younger I knew about the Holy Spirit but I don't think I ever recognized it as such until I was about 11 when I was baptized in the Holy Spirit. That has to be the most amazing thing I've ever experienced. I started praying in tongues right when it happened (like in Acts 2 - just minus the tongue of fire) and now I pray in tongues pretty regularly. Usually it's when I don't know what to pray - like when I'm praying for something in particular and run out of things to pray about for that situation or when I'm praying intensely. I'll switch from English to praying in the Spirit (sometimes without even realizing). It's just such a God thing. :) For those who may not be familiar with the term "praying in tongues" it's basically just letting the Holy Spirit guide your words as you pray in a different language. I don't know how to explain it better than that - it's a total God thing.
In the Bible times (especially in Acts), all sorts of miracles were happening. If God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, why don't we see the same things happening? Personally, I think that the reason we're not seeing miracles is that we don't believe it can really happen. Seriously, if you knew that you could walk up to a blind person say, "Be healed!" and they would be able to see, wouldn't you do it? I know I would! In other countries, miracles are happening - why are they not happening where I live? I'm going to be completely honest - I am not willing to pray for miraculous healing because I am afraid of embarrassment - as in, I'll feel ridiculous because I asked for immediate healing and nothing happened. When I pray for people in need of healing, it's usually along these lines: "God, help her to get through this difficult time. Give her the strength and grace to get through it. I ask that You would heal her body and let her know You're with her." I'm afraid to just speak out with faith and say "Lord, heal her now!" When Jesus healed people, He commanded them to be healed. He commanded the demons to leave. Peter and John told the lame man at the Gate Beautiful to "Get up and walk!" I know I need to be willing to just speak out. Like I said earlier, I think it really comes down to a lack of faith - at least for me, that's what it is.
Love of all you girls!! Sorry that my comment was so long... ;)
Posted by: Sarah Elizabeth | 01/29/2013 at 07:13 PM
Tonight I went to a Tenth Avenue North concert. Their music is amazing and God-filled. What they have to say always touches me and it certainly did tonight. I've been really struggling with self-injury again and this whole week, yesterday and today especially have been exceptionally trying. I was standing there, clapping and singing as people do at concerts, trying to be happy but not really feeling it like I usually do. I sang the words feeling like such a hypocrite as they talked about how we know God loves us, how we know its okay not to be perfect, how its okay to struggle. That's when I realized I didn't quit believe it. Or at I at least wasn't living like it. One of the lyrics in the song was "Hallelujah we are free to struggle, we're not struggling to be free." That line really hit me. I've been feeling chained by this addiction, and guilty for struggling, feeling like I have no right to hurt or to complain. I'm a Christian...I guess I've been seeing that as the reason I have to be perfect, like when I screw up, I shouldn't even call myself a Christian because I don't deserve that title. I was wrestling with these thoughts, telling God that I couldn't do it, I couldn't go on, make it through this, day, this week, this month, full of uncertainty. A verse was whispered in my mind "My power is made perfect in your weakness..." those words kept coming to mind, like the Holy Spirit speaking to me. I fought them, pushed them away and continued to protest, but they remained, like an echo. I continued to sing and at one point he asked us all to raise our hands. I was really self conscious at first. My arms are the very place that shows every mistake I've made. No matter what I use to cover the marks, God still sees. I reluctantly lifted my hands. I listened to the music, "You are more then the sum of your past mistakes" the words said, and I started sobbing. It was more of a no tears, whole body shaking kind of cry, where everything is sore from holding by the tears. I can't say I've had a huge epiphany or a new sense of direction but I let myself feel God, the Holy Spirit was there, I know it and I listened. The voice remains as a recurring whisper in my mind. It raised some questions, some food for thought, some things to ponder and consider as I try to get through each day.
Posted by: Therese | 01/29/2013 at 10:53 PM
Wow! I'm going to need time to comment on this.
This post was so beautiful.
Posted by: May | 01/30/2013 at 02:36 AM
This series has been a hard one for me. I feel like I'm trying to participate and FEEL things and BE moved, but really I'm just confused. I feel like I'm willing to do something big for God, but I have no idea where to start.
I just found out my family is moving to another state, and I know that comes with some pretty big changes. Weirdly, I'm not worried or anxious. I'll miss my friends, but I'm just not nervous. I just wish I was feeling something, instead of feeling numb. I do want to get excited, but I don't really want my hopes to get up too high. My parents say, "Don't let your highs get too high or your lows get too low." -- But being in the middle is not that great.
Music is my favorite place to be. It is safe. I lose myself in the song, and I don't have to feel anything. I'm just singing, being myself, and everything disappears. After reading your post, Therese, I'm going to add Tenth Avenue North to my Pandora account.
This was a great post, and girls, your comments are wonderful. I love reading this blog.
Love you girls!
Prayers,
Ireland
Posted by: Ireland | 01/30/2013 at 10:07 AM
I've been familiar with Holy Spirit ever since I was really little (grew up in church, was baptized, taught that Jesus was always with me etc.) But it wasn't until a few years ago that I really began to understand-- Jesus sent Holy Spirit to us so that He could guide us and teach us and, basically, help us get closer to Jesus. After I began to grasp that, I started talking with Holy Spirit each day. As of late, I've also been trying to take short, 10 second breaks during my day to just quiet down and focus on Holy Spirit and receive whatever He has for me. Even though it's only a few seconds, it helps keep my focus on Jesus.
Sometimes I feel the Holy Spirit and am so moved by Him that I cry or laugh, but usually I just hear that still, small voice or feel a "nudge" about something.
Just yesterday, I was having a really difficult time with a friend, whose been struggling with low self-esteem. Everything within me wanted to just ignore the problem and walk away-- but when I was praying about the situation, I felt like God wanted me to put aside my frustration and discuss the problem with my friend.
I was willing to talk with my friend, but I still felt pretty irritated-- that's when my parents and I prayed together and asked God to help me love my friend the way Jesus does, and look past her issues and see her as a beautiful daughter of Christ. I kept praying about it, and the Lord really did begin to change my heart towards this girl. It was SO cool! I've kept praying about the situation and feel like Holy Spirit is going to guide me in what to say and how to be a good friend. Actually, I'm going to be meeting with this friend less than an hour from now! Praying it goes well :)
Posted by: Sasha | 01/30/2013 at 11:43 AM
Praying for everyone :)
Well I'm usually a really quiet, nervous person. In school we have scripture union but only about 20 at the most pupils go to it out of 750ish. You can't have a proper conversations with someone (including my friends) without a swear word popping up at least once. I think they've lost their true meaning and are just thrown around. I often find I've said one before even realising it . I guess I'm afraid that ill get made fun off. Anyone who would speak openly about their faith would stick out from the crowd and more than likely get made fun of. I think I get caught up in school work, sport, clubs etc
Sorry for ranting on :y
Posted by: Amy | 01/30/2013 at 05:39 PM
Praying for everyone, but Therese in particular - I know what a hard cycle self-injury is to break. What I think finally helped me was I started writing down every time I felt the urge to cut/bruise myself (I used the notes app on my iPhone because I always had it with me and I could were stuff down whenever I needed to because if other people saw they just assumed I was texting). If ever I felt like bruising myself I'd write down the reason(s) (e.g. Can't figure out homework, Mom's mad at me, frustrated at myself), if I felt like cutting I'd write down the reason plus a * after it, and if I caved and actually hurt myself I'd write a * in front of the reason. My original intent was to write it all down so I could see what effected me the most and then deal with those problems first, but it ended up serving another purpose - if I ever felt the urge I'd write it down (without the * in front since I hadn't acted upon it yet) and I'd sit there staring at it and say to myself, "I don't need to add that *. I DON'T need to add that *. I do NOT need to add that *." Then I'd text a friend asking for prayer. Sorry that was so long, but I hope it helps. <3
So...I really haven't felt the Holy Spirit in a while - it kinda makes me want me miss my self-injury days because that was when I could really feel the tug of war between It and Satan. Like one minute I'd be praying and dancing around my room with my doggie to Christian music, the next minute I'd feel like a total idiot and I'd find myself in the kitchen with a knife in one hand and a scar on the other, the next minute I'd be back to dancing...it was kinda bizarre. Parts of it were horrible. But the parts where I felt the Holy Spirit were wonderful.
Posted by: Abby:) | 01/30/2013 at 06:48 PM
Hello gorgeous girls
I know Mrs. Rue doesn’t usually like us talking about books and stuff, but this seems so fitting. The Sadie’s Sketchbook series by Faithgirlz is ‘too young for me’ but it’s still my favourite Faithgirlz series. Long before reading the series I’ve had a drawing ritual simular to hers. For those of you who haven’t read the books (you should) Sadie, the main character, does drawing sessions with God. She draws whatever the Holy Spirit urges her to and once it’s her troubles are laid out of paper, she can see them much more clearly and find a way to escape them. The Holy Spirit can be different for different people. For me, the Holy Spirit is an inspiration that helps me sort everything out on paper. Sometimes this just keeps me breathing.
Please pray. Next month is our five year anniversary in our ‘new’ house. No one knows how much I miss my home. I have the best friends in the whole world back home and I love them heaps. I’m so lucky they come and visit and I get to visit them. Sometimes that two-hundred kilometre stretch between us seems like five million miles. Me and my friends balanced each other out. Now two other friends have gone in two totally different directions and my best friend back home is probably feeling totally lonely. We both went back to school a few days ago, and it must be totally different for her without her best friends there. I’m struggling without them.
I’m so grateful for you girls for being my friends because sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve any.
Praying for all of you.
Posted by: May | 01/30/2013 at 10:06 PM
So I had a post all written out but I decided I couldn't post it. It sounded too encouragement-y and flowery, and not that that's bad because I do want to be there to encourage you girls, but it's not where my head is at right now.
The one thing the Holy Spirit kind of keeps throwing in my path recently is something along the lines of me needing to focus on me. I've spent much of these past few years running from one thing to the next, trying to please people, and just wearing myself out. This year the Holy Spirit just keeps sending me gentle reminders to focus on myself, to focus on healing my mind, my body and my spirit. This definitely isn't easy, but it's something i feel lead to do right now. And doors just keep opening for me. Instead of searching for a job I didn't love that would only stress me out, my auntie offered me a part time job working at her company, and a lady from our church offered me a part time positiion as her nanny, working once a week and taking care of her wonderful girls whom I already love.
It's been a really crazy journey. I kind of compare it to a sermon I heard once, I'm basically locking my wings and riding this air current that if I tried to fly on my own would probably kill me. But I'm locking my wings (One is trust, the other is obey) and I'm doing what God tells me to do. And I'm trusting that He will provide.
I'm taking a step back from life, from control (Ah!!!) and just trusting, which is a lot scarier then it sounds.
So, if you girls could also remember to keep me in your prayers as I have some pretty big decisions I need to make, and some pretty big things that are going to happen in the near future that have the potential to change my life (Namely, a doctors appointment on February 5. just finished 3 days of crazy intensive testing that didn't go as well as I'd hoped). It is totally scary but I'm trusting and obeying, standing my position and believing God will take care of me.
And I have to run, but maybe later i'll comment and finish the encouraging part of this message (Therese, I'm praying for you, girl! I've been there! Know you are not alone and that we love you)
praying for you all
Posted by: Alisha | 01/31/2013 at 12:40 AM
Hey all,
(Therese- I'll email you back shortly. I promise. I'm just thinking of what to tell you, to be honest).
For me, it's just hard to grasp that I don't seem the Holy Spirit working in the same ways in the United States. I know He's there working in me. That Bible Verse I just "flip to" and it is just what I needed, those words that come out of my mouth, encouraging or advising when I had no clue what to say, led to tears at worship, that sensation or knowing of the Holy Spirit's presence, or extreme lack of, but I guess the transition for me was/is a really tough one.
Posted by: Paige | 01/31/2013 at 12:36 PM
Girls, I feel like we are all in the same room having this conversation face to face, tear to tear, smile to smile - know that I am praying for every one of you, and I continue to be so blessed and amazed by your comments.
I've been praying to the Spirit mor
e recently as well, and really thinking about what an amazing gift He is! God chose to put a bit of Himself inside each one of us who accepts Him, and He is constantly there just aching to bring us to His love, guiding us with the still small voice. For a while, I struggled with feeling kind of lost in my own life. I felt like I wasn't sure what my priorities were and what I believed, opinions, and even questioned whether I had any friends who I could completely trust and open up to. But this year, God has blessed me so much with a new group of friends who build me up in my faith and bring me joy every single day, and I have come to the realization that God isn't done molding me yet. I'm not sure of who I am yet, but it's okay, because God is. And when I see His power and beauty and wonder in the world around me, when all of a sudden the right words to say pop into my head, when I find myself actually managing to balance all of the things in life that are so important to me, THAT'S where I feel the Spirit within me. I''ve come to the wonderful acceptance that God doesn't always work in huge obvious miracles, but in the little day-to-day moments when the still small voice calls me to holiness. And those moments add up to a life that can't help but burst forth with the radiance of heaven.
One nudge I've been responding to recently is to just stop througout my day to take a breath and have a God-break, just a few minutes or even seconds to pray and just let myself be with the One who loves and sustains me perfectly. Oh, and Project 365 has kinda turned into a prayer journal, a place where the Spirit brings me to thoughts and realizations that can only be from God.
LOVING this series Mrs. Rue!!! Praying for everyone always
Love and Blessings,
*Rachel*
Posted by: *Rachel* | 01/31/2013 at 11:11 PM