I had a post planned but after reading your comments I've decided to go a little different route this afternoon. That next passage from John on obedience will still be there to come back to.
I feel like I need to honor the honesty that came through your responses to the last post.
THERESE'S fear of letting go of self-injury, even though she knows there's healing in it for her if she does. "Cutting seems to be my only out. I'm scared to let go of control and trust someone else to help me."
ALISHA's understanding of that because she's been there -- and her applicaton of that to yet another round of doctor's appointments that have the potential to change her life forever. What, she asks, do you do when you let go of something that's chained you and in a way held you for so long? Even when you know what is waiting on the other side has to be better than what you are living right now. Even when the Holy Spirit is nudging you, it's still hard to move out of your comfort zone. What if you take one step forward and wind up two steps back?
SASHA feels that the Holy Spirit is asking her to redefine her opinion of sucess. Until now, she's believed if she's not perfect, then she must be a failure. "Still trying to figure out exactly what the Lord's definition of success is, but I feel like Holy Spirit is nudging me to search it out."
ASHLEY, too, feels the pressure to be perfect, being the pastor's daughter -- and yet she's struggling in her relationshp with God.
It seems to me that what's on your mind is "success" -- the fear of it, the definition of it, the futility of even reaching for it. I'm moved by that -- because I think the very kind of thinking you're doing is a guarantee that you WILL achieve success -- the success God wants for you.
How to get there? I think you may have answered that yourselves already, but let me have a try at nutshelling that for you.
Could it be that sucess is overcoming what you're most afraid of?
I don't want to say any more about that at the moment. I'd just like for you to ponder it. Pray about it. Think about it in light of your current experience. Then share -- your doubts, questions, that thing you're most afraid of. I truly want to know, and I think we all do, yes?
Before we go, a few prayers. Your Sisters have asked you to go to God for:
ASHLEY who feels she has to struggle alone right now.
AMY'S best guy friend who has family problems and is bullied a lot and may have an eating issue
ALISHA who returns home tonight after two days of non-stop doctors.
THERESE who is starting counseling again for the troubling problem of self-injury.
Merciful God, hear our prayer.
Okay, one more one more thing: PAIGE made a suggestion for Lent -- 40 days of giving up worrying. (We could call it "Giving Up Freaking Out". Or not)I think we could have fun with that as well as go deep. I'm still open to more ideas. Even if we don't use yours during Lent, there ARE other seasons!